her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
