im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
