He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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