a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
