so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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