i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
