"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize