I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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