In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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