I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
