I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
