so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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