I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
My life is pants optional.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
