I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
