i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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