I cockslap morals
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
