i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
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