Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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