Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
