I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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