Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
