i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
