Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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