i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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