That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize