I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
you win again, gameday.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
