why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
