Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
