you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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