Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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