OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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