Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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