sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
