I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
