am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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