BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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