i wish peter jackson would direct porn
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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