let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
stop calling my apartment porn island.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize