Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
