Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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