Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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