It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
