im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
