but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
