Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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