I am puke
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
