just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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