yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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