ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Randomize
