Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
no. you can't hotbox the world.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
